Yesterday was Great....And I am So Mad

Yesterday was a GREAT day! And I am so mad that I could scream.

Yesterday was the first day in more than a month that I saw my little girl.  Sure, Sunshine hasn't been physically gone, but she just hasn't been here.

For more than a month she has not been able to focus, is often confused and has not been able to speak anything meaningful.  She has been stimming to try to make herself feel better.  Sunshine suffers from a metabolic disorder that causes seizures. And these seizures have been stealing my child.

But yesterday was different.  We had a change in medication.  The neurologist warned, she may be very sleepy and cranky, as we have tripled her usual dose temporarily to calm her brain.  This medication increase is temporary, until the pharmacy can get her new medication.  We prepared for Sunshine to sleep away her day.

Instead, Sunshine was the best she has been in I don't know how long.  Our little girl played.  She played ALL DAY.  Usually, she only has the energy to last about 10 minutes before she needs to lay down or take a break.  But yesterday, she was so NORMAL.  I know you aren't supposed to use that word, but that is what it was! She played, she spoke to us, she interacted with her siblings, she requested what she wanted.  She even sought me out to say "what's this?" about a piece of her Red Rocket, a rocket she flew around the house most of the day.  If you have a child with a language delay or communication disorder, you get how big this is.

She seemed so at peace with herself.  Anyone with a child with a Central Nervous System Disorder, Autism or Sensory Processing Disorder can relate.  There days when your child is literally crawling in their own skin.  But yesterday was different.

When it was time for bed, Sunshine did not want to go. Instead she said, "I want to play!" She did not want the day to end. Neither did we. 

So now I sit at 5am typing my first blog, hoping that  I can be just as mad today as I was yesterday!